Category: General

Lessons from Auntie Rona

Posted on by misspoobles

I would be less stressed from this predicament the world is facing right now if human beings showed some semblance of humanity. Compassion, generosity and selflessness was really all this virus demands of us and yet here we are.

All of the world’s ills are flagrantly dancing before our eyes like the golden calf scene from “The Ten Commandments”

This is no different from what I am seeing on the world’s beaches for those countries with the worst infection/mortality rates. Those same countries have deniers, affluent who believe that others would be willing to die for their ability to live comfortably and the terrorists using this very vulnerable world state to advance their hate crimes.

I just read a post in social media about the studies proving that the drug touted by a certain orange dictator poses severe risk of heart damage or death if used to battle the infection. And yet there are people who deny the science behind the studies and the mortalities from it as some liberal propaganda.

The Lancet is a medical journal produced for doctors to learn of the latest advances and studies in medicine. There is no rational excuse to believe that it is propaganda.

I know and absolutely espouse that science is not exact as it is ever evolving based on what we know at the time and what evidence presents itself with further testing to either prove or disprove a thesis. Just because the studies say that there is a high risk of death or further organ compromise of this drug and the data is sound, I do not believe we should tilt our tinfoil hats and decide the science is completely wrong. This is what we know now and we should act on what we know to be true now while continuing to test.

The thing I see is that no one is willing to test. Not surprising in my 30 year history in the testing arena. No one likes the testing portion of any development activity. Testing is necessary, early and often.

Period.

We cannot fully understand the impact of this pandemic or even qualify it as a pandemic without testing both the ill and the healthy to understand the whole environment and measure from there.

That is to have everyone take a baseline test to be sure at that moment in time they either had it or didn’t and then shelter in place the healthy who were not essential workers while those that did quarantined so they could let it run the course. With only essential workers out and about to support the infrastructure of those SIP and those on the lines. The essentials being tested every day while the otherwise sheltered or infirm are kept in isolation.

But hardly anyone was willing to take it to that level.

This is a simple and effective model. And for some countries, they put that in play and they saw the least impact of the virus for the great sacrifice they had to make. Hats off to you, New Zealand. You are superstars.

Never in my life have I seen such simpering, whimpering, insolence from so many about simple considerations for their fellow human.

  • I’ve seen people hoarding basic supplies to make it difficult for their neighbors to shelter in place.
  • I’ve seen assaults like punching, coughing and spitting at others when asked to show some consideration by wearing a mask.
  • I’ve seen people using this compromised situation to behave like bigots against the asian population.
  • I’ve seen people attempt to murder another for being asked to leave premises until they have properly worn PPE.
  • I’ve seen people of affluence and power abuse the rules they put in place to protect from spread and then lie about it when the public questions their actions.
  • I’ve seen people furloughed start protests to get their jobs back at the risk of contracting the virus rather than taking a remote work opportunity in the interim to keep everyone safe. One woman’s justification was “Why would I take a job I do not like for this period? When they can open the door at my previous job which I do like?”
  • I’ve seen white supremacists use this time to assault/murder people of color because they feel they can.
  • I’ve seen an increase in shooting victims in my own town because people do not know how to handle staying put.
  • I’ve seen one politician claim that his parents would be willing to die to keep the stock market from tanking.

What the ever loving fuck is wrong with these people?

Don’t worry, this is a rhetorical question. I know what is wrong. People have not been raised to be generous, kind or compassionate. Their egos are what drives them and that is why this virus will kill far more people than it should.

I am well past weeping for this society.

Believe me, I know there are people who are generous, kind and compassionate through all of this and they are the ultimately the victims of the masses who are persisting the virus through their own avarice.

The overworked essential workers who are fighting fatigue and emotional stressors while new cases arrive keeping them in this situation. They do not need daily claps. They need hazard pay, steady stream of nourishment and PPE, and they need our full cooperation.

It’s ALL a Gamble

Posted on by misspoobles

I have friends/family on both sides of the fence regarding the virus. Some that feel economy should come first and others who feel that lives should come first.

I’m not a gambler with lives. I’m not willing to spread this virus. Hell I wasn’t cool about people coming to work with “ahem” allergies.

We all knew it wasn’t allergies, Bob. You were sick and should have called in and worked from home or just took the fucking day.

I also know that I’m part of the demographic who would not survive it anyway. My blood clotting has always been an issue and my heart struggles to pump blood through my body to oxygenate and keep circulation at its best, as it is. But even if I was healthy and had a good chance to survive it; I know I would not gamble with others’ chances if I was an asymptomatic carrier.

What I’m having a problem with (a real moral conundrum here) is listening to the political rhetoric of money over lives — that money is somehow more important than preserving life. Texas politician announcing that some lives have to be lost for the economy. Another southern politician saying that his grandparents would gladly take the fall for preserving the economy.

Are you sure about that, Bucky?

I saw government leaders changing policy to allow people back to work on their dime to be sure people who are most vulnerable are fed. You see, we can adapt while staying isolated. An entire auto manufacturing plant refactored their core business to make necessary PPE for their country needing it. Why can’t we adopt a new model for food distribution? 

None of these plants and farms need to waste it. They are trying to take the stance of a overly dramatic child because they can’t “do it as they have always done.” Look to your local communities, and see how crops need to shift to allow for serving the local. 

I know that not every zone can grow avocados… but therein lies the issue. We don’t necessarily need to have avocados. (Gasps!) 

People would certainly relax and take a deep sigh of relief if they knew that they could get their produce locally (order online and doorstep delivery for dairy, produce…etc). If they knew during this time, their bills would be suspended until they could get back out from quarantine. Maybe people would stay home.

And honestly, what does it say about a person who simply cannot be happy in their own home and take some downtime and focus on their families? 

In war time, people had ration books to handle the day to day food and grocery needs. No hoarding necessary and people learned to live leanly and sensibly in the crisis. If this is a war, then why are we not doing this? Because as Mr. Monebags grasps his murse and Mrs. Moneybags clutches her pearls, they stand in front of a situation screaming for a new way to live;  they don’t want to lose their advantage and privilege. They cannot design a method for living that figures out how to survive this without killing people needlessly, and still retain wealth.

Peter Politician: There is another way to handle this other than protecting your mountainous piles of investments.  Why can’t you serve the all of the people like you swore you would?

The world watches the countries who haven’t got their shit together and claim they are “for the people” whilst shoving those same people under the bus.  And speaking of people, what is wrong with people who cannot see past the end of their own noses? 

A child’s school function, graduation is postponed or cancelled for the sake of the safety of all. And yet their parents continually whine over it. What does that do?

Would you be crying over this if you knew that they would not survive if infected?

For them I wish to say: “Get a grip. people. This is a gamble. For many youths who die because of this, they are someone’s child. Their parents wanted more for them too. They are crying for a good reason. Just hug your graduate, athlete and take heart they are safe. Is the pomp and circumstance worth losing grandma over? How about Dad?”

I absolutely hate that you are classified as an essential worker. I am inside and out beside myself with worry for you. Your whole life is ahead of you and I would be destroyed knowing that if you got this you would not survive it. It is a gamble. Though I do not know how you would live with yourself if you chose to quit for your own safety. You are that kind of person. 

I wrestle with this daily. Do I demand that you quit to protect you? Or do I let you work and risk it?  

Self Identification

Posted on by misspoobles

The world is more complicated now than when I was your age. Sexual orientation/gender identity was not something we needed to go around flashing like a business card. I knew at an early age who I was and that I was not like people around me. I didn’t fit in to the binary definition of gender. I suspect neither do you.

Sure, I was assigned a gender at birth as you were; but deep down, what am I? I still do not know for certain. What I do know is that it does not matter to anyone else but me. I do not need to tell people what my orientation is or what my self identified gender is. Never in the workplace, or in a social setting. It is personal to me.

That said, some people have to disclose because their identity is so different from their assignment that it makes it hard to get along in a binary-centric world. Imagine identifying as female in a gender assigned male body having to shower with cis-males in a gym. Feeling wholly uncomfortable. I could seriously empathize. Being forced to live along a gender stereotype they just did not align? When all they want to do is be who they know themselves to be without criticism, condemnations or harassments.

I hated my first year at college, because I neither identified as male or female and felt really out of place and crawl-out-of-my-skin uncomfortable when having to shower in the women’s dormitory where it was a large open space with a bunch of shower heads lining the perimeter. I would wait until the weirdest time of day to shower so I could do so in peace. I simply never felt aligned with other women. But I never felt all the way male either. If there was a gender in between, I could see that’s where I fell. I think I was fluid, though I thought I might be genderless in High School. Depending on the day I could tap into a feminine or masculine sensibility, but I never felt that I needed to pick a side. Except that society expected it of me.

We now live in an age where that expectation is being confronted with the words

Why?
Not anymore.

I am excited for the time when gender identity does not have to be part of the conversation. That people are accepted no matter how they identify or what their orientation is. There is no difficult decision in a changing room, or restroom, gym or dormitory setting as to what door to enter. That people are not discriminated against for living their truth. Nor are they excluded, disowned, attacked, murdered because an ignorant fuck feels threatened. That they don’t have to decide to exit this earth to get relief from a persecuted life.

That just because I marry a man does not mean I am turning in my queer card. It just means that I loved him enough to want to spend the rest of my life with him and bear his child because my body is wired to do so.  If I had met a woman who I fell for in the same way I would have married her. That I should not have to justify who I am or my choices to any group. And finally, that I need not grab a label to slap on my chest to inform everyone else what/who I am. I don’t care to share my pronouns because they are mine and not yours. And I am not offended if you choose to use a pronoun that matches my physical gender because you don’t know.

I recognize that the journey to this freedom has been paved by warriors and martyrs alike who paid difficult prices to get to that extraordinary time in the future. I know and respect that they need these pronouns to teach tolerance and acceptance.

Some day I will be able to go into a clothing store and not see a segregation by blue or pink and cringe. That I will see a time where restrooms are private and inclusive for all to use without pausing to look at signage to decide how to proceed.

I’m really an introvert

Posted on by misspoobles

You may think by my demeanor in public that I’m a socially extroverted person. Why else would I hold long conversations with complete strangers?

Because they started it.

I am quite happy to work on my own in solitude, listening to an audiobook, NPR or music of my choosing.

When I’m out in public, I’m not seeking a social exchange. I’d rather get my things and go.

So why the chatter?

Two reasons

  1. I’m nervous around others so I make the small talk to get through it
  2. I’m irritated by the interruption of the social exchange.

In the latter case, I’m apt to carry the conversation uncomfortably longer than necessary until it is a load of awkward. That way the individual is less likely to chat me up in the future.

In the case of nervousness, I use it to diffuse an otherwise tense or uncomfortable situation for all involved. Giving blood for a blood test…I don’t want to be in this slightly vulnerable situation with a complete stranger…so let the idle chatter commence.

I highly recommend babbling excitedly to a solicitor or evangelist to teach a lesson on why introverts need to be left alone.

I recall a phone conversation going on far longer than needed, so I chose to take command of the conversation and read a help guide to the person. About three pages worth. The call was being monitored for quality purposes; so it became a teachable moment for that agent and future agents in training.

I take great pleasure in turning the tables if my need for space and quiet has been threatened or dare they, infringe upon it.

And I hope you know that if I am seemingly sociable it’s not because I want to be. I’d rather be left to myself.

Power Trips

Posted on by misspoobles

I know that you haven’t had a ton of experience dating but alas, I worry. I worry for the hurt you might experience at the hands of a master manipulator, a predatory user, or simply a narcissistic psychopath. A wolf in sheep’s clothing as it were.

Some folks are kind and sweet upon first meeting, or just mysterious enough that their true nature is withheld. You may not see it until much much later, or maybe after a significant challenge to your relationship that reveals it. I can describe all the ways a person could turn out to be the worst possible excuse for a human being but this post is about the aftermath, the recovery in the event you sever the bond.

For your health and heart, when you discover you are in such a relationship and the hurt is beyond what any reasonable person should bear. You must break it off. Don’t look ahead and try to preserve it just because you fear being alone or you think it is mendable.

Once a person hurts you, it is what you do in that moment that defines the relationship. If you stay with them after being hurt repeatedly; you are effectively giving them the power to do it over and over again. The strength of knowing when to leave is the challenge.

You’re going to second guess your choice, because the hurt may cut so deep it feels never-ending. Reconciling with that person may seem like the panacea for this pain, but then you are saying to them “What you did to me that caused our breakup is allowable from this point forward.”

I recommend you walk away and do not look back. It is tempting to look back – to see if they are hurting as much as you are. That’s a torture you should never inflict upon yourself. It will spark outrage, more pain and hurt, immense sadness for your own situation and incite an obsession over them and why they are faring well and you are not.

No matter how they play it, if they reach out you do not respond. If you open a door a crack they’re going to push on through to deliver more of a hurt than before. They may have others reach out to you to taunt and bait you – picking at an open wound that is not theirs to pick. Seriously there are some sick people out there.

Sadists.

If you show weakness or sadness and it gets back to them, they use it. You keep your healing private. I know you’re not a social media user but you may have mutual friends and it will matter with whom you confide. Yes, confide in close friends of your feelings but only the ones you truly trust and will not allow your status to get back to your ex.

Some things I need you to do on a breakup, which helps the healing process:

  1. Block them from contacting you – block their number, their ability to email you.
  2. Remove all reminders of them (pictures, notes, gifts) for the time being. This may mean a donation to a charity shop or just putting things in storage but get it out and away from reminding you.
  3. Do not listen to the music that reminds you of a moment with them (either positive or negative)
  4. Do not watch programmes or films which may immediately remind you of moments with them. (this is not forever, just until the association is distant enough)
  5. If there are still belongings of theirs in your possession place them in a box and drop it with a mutual friend or if the break is exceptionally bad, leave it out on the street and tell the mutual friend to inform the ex to get it before others do.
  6. Do not – I repeat – Do Not ever expect closure. Do not try to maneuver for an apology. Just be okay with never getting closure or an acknowledgement of their transgression and any sort of remorse on their part. It will not happen.
  7. Get involved in new activities & change your routines to get you away from common haunts which could allow you to run into them.
  8. Find ways toward understanding what you need and what makes you happy. Invest in yourself. Go on a trip, take a class to learn a new skill, pamper yourself. Be with supportive and loving people.
  9. Give your time to a charitable cause to make life better for others. See my prior post to you on healing your heart.

And lastly, build your confidence up to find your inner peace before embarking on a new relationship. Rebound relationships do not really help. Give yourself at least a year to really recover from a bad break before getting back out there.

Rehab Time Rebuttal

Posted on by misspoobles

Trent Shelton is promoting a video where the tag line is “It’s rehab time!” Much of the message is quite true – it seems to miss the mark by a margin. I will leave the link here for you to view:

I understand what he’s trying to convey. However, he still leads the viewer down the path of expectation in which others are there to support you throughout your life and if they are not they should be cut from your life. This is categorically not a realistic expectation.

It would be lovely to think that everyone was here to help you achieve or self actualize, but to tell you the hard truth. It is all on you to get there. People cheering, assisting or promoting you along the way is just extra.

My grandmother told me from early on, “There is no one truly looking out for you but you. Never forget that. Not your siblings, your teachers, your doctors, your government, your parents, your partner or your friends. Only you.”

I realized once I accepted that level of expectation – that I am the captain of my own ship, I guide the sails, I maintain it, I decide the course I am on and when to correct it; no perceived let down from others mattered.

If you go into life knowing that everyone is ultimately out for themselves and you are not their primary concern, then you can not be phased should they turn away or leave your life.

Read “The Giving Tree” again. It is an important message. You give but you do not expect a return. This is parenting. However, eventually, I will let you down – when I die. I cannot be there to give until you die. That’s just not how life works. Does it mean you should cut me out of your life? No.

You shouldn’t cut anyone out of your life just for not “serving you”. That’s a horribly self-centered point of view. I have a ton of friends I enjoy in my life but I would never expect them to constantly lift me up in times of crisis or need. That is on me – not them. They have priorities outside mine. I need to respect that. There could be things going on in their lives which need their full attention and I am not a part of that.

Making a Mean Sauce

Posted on by misspoobles

We’ve made this together before and I shared how I learned it as well. But for the sake of your occasional lost memories, I’ll go though it again.

My grandfather (my mother’s father) cooked. He taught me how to grill, bake pies, make a decent roast. And he taught me this basic barbecue sauce recipe.

Remember this is a recipe of unmeasured amounts, though I always mix mine up in a 2 cup Pyrex measure. And like the dressing, make only what you need.

This recipe is flexible too. The base consists of a tomato sauce (catsup, tomato purée, unseasoned tomato sauce, or during desperate times – a can on condensed tomato soup), a sweetener (honey, OR brown sugar OR molasses), a mustard (yellow, Dijon, brown), liquid smoke, seasonings (Worcestershire sauce, OR BBQ rub seasoning) AND liquid smoke

The one we made together was pretty basic but my go-to for ribs or chicken on the grill.

You need:

1 c tomato base (catsup in this case)

1 generous handful of brown sugar

2 TBSP of BBQ rub seasoning

1 tsp of yellow mustard

And a few drops of liquid smoke (to taste)

Mix until all is incorporated and smooth. Taste it and be sure it is how you remember it.

If it’s too sweet add more tomato base and a little more mustard.

Not smokey enough? A few more drops of liquid smoke.

Not sweet enough? A little more sweetener.

Too Smokey? Make more of the base without the smoke and add to your too smokey concoction.

This is another where you use whatever is on hand that fits the basic recipe premise.

This should cover both sides of a rack of ribs or all areas of a whole chicken.

Never reuse the sauce days later if you have leftovers. Cross contamination of meat juices from partially cooked meats is a recipe for an all night date with the toilet.

Seriously only make what you need. If you had to double it due to a “too smokey” situation, split what you have into two containers so that you don’t have to pitch any leftovers.

You should be able to keep the overage for about a week tightly covered in the fridge.

**A note about molasses: a little goes a long way and it has a powerful dimension of flavor. If you use it start conservatively until you have the taste where you like it.

Dressing for Success

Posted on by misspoobles

I will not leave you without you knowing how to make the dressings and sauces I made for you. My grandfather’s cousin made a killer dressing for salads which I never had the recipe. She made it from scratch every time and would pour it over iceberg lettuce and it was hella good!

Another was made by my mother’s mother and it was simply a hot dressing made from what I believed to be hot bacon grease and scratchings with vinegar and she would dress bitter greens with it. I never knew how to make them, lord knows I tried some experiments; but they never quite met my memory of them.

If anything I can leave you in terms of knowledge about cooking, is that you do not have to buy bottled dressings or sauces. You’re better off making it on the fly. Use only what you need in the moment.

If you need a salad dressing you need to know I make one dressing but then doctor it to be whatever I need it to be.

The base consists of an oil, a sweetener, a seasoning, and some acidic agent. I start with 1/4 c of olive oil. Then the sweetener (to taste) is either a balsamic vinegar reduction (light or dark), OR honey. Any acidic agent could be a citrus juice, pomegranate, cranberry (unsweetened), dijon mustard, apple cider vinegar. Seasonings, could be any herbs, spices or onion or garlic – just to give it punch.

It is a flexible dressing.
Honey mustard dressing you say?
1/4 c Olive oil
2 TBSP Dijon Mustard (either creamy or the seedy kind)
A generous squeeze of honey (but be careful- start small and add to taste)

Use a fork to whisk it together until smooth.

That citrus salad dressing?
1/4 c Olive Oil
The juice of one lemon (lime) (orange)
A generous squeeze of light balsamic vinegar reduction glaze (you can make this from scratch too)
2-3 crushed garlic cloves
Fresh ground pepper

Use a fork to whisk it together until all is incorporated. It is best if you let it rest for a while to let the garlic infuse with the dressing.

An Italian dressing?
1/4 c Olive Oil
a splash of the apple cider vinegar
2 crushed garlic cloves
Fresh minced oregano and basil

Whisk until smooth.

Get creative with it. I did a lime and crushed mint vinaigrette for a fruit salad using this method.

Lobbing My Bombs

Posted on by misspoobles

This morning I woke up knowing that this is my second day into year 52 and it was a Sunday. Scanning through the headlines or propagandist matter that floats through my media feeds, I realized in 52 years I have been leading a life filled with lies and hypocrisies. Some I have known long ago and some I have learned over the years.

I am sad and angry at the same time but you know that.

I think you’ve asked me a couple times indirectly, why I no longer go to church. It’s simple. I don’t believe that my faith in god requires me to present myself to a gathering other others to prove I believe. I go in there and all I can do is look around and see a bunch of poseurs just gracing each other with their presence in their finery and to me, it is purely superficial.

“When you pray, you shall not be as the hypocrites, for
they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and in the
corners of the streets, that they may be seen by men. Most
certainly, I tell you, they have received their reward.” – Matt. 6:5

I believe every action and word is a prayer/offering to god. The omniscient ever present deity sees what is in your heart and all that you do. And although I should not, I do judge those who show up and posture in the churches and on the street corners –shouting/singing the loudest as if they think their volume lofts them closer to their place in heaven.

That’s why I do not go. I invest my time and money in the immediate community regardless of their faith because I believe that is what we are meant to be doing. And I am not looking for recognition for any of it.

This goes to my next bomb. I don’t think people need a pat on the back for every good deed turned.  Being a decent human being is not a show which requires some sort of compensation/reward.  I think that’s why it irks me to see people filming themselves doing good in the world as a sort of self promotion. Dear lord! If you have to be seen doing it otherwise you won’t, then you’re lost far beyond what a map can handle.

I will also stand by my avoidance of all things evangelical. I should not force my opinion on you or anyone else. I can tell you what it is, but I am not going to expect you to believe the same thing. Everyone has a choice to do good or not. It is not up to me or anyone else to coerce others toward a path to be a decent human being. Ultimately, one will face their deeds on their last day.

I will say it has taken a number of years to put aside my vigilante ways. Fighting against those who have done wrong to show them the error in their ways. I felt it was a cause I needed to front. Sometimes I was able to deal the punishment for the crime, but sometimes it backfired on me and I should have taken that as my hint to leave it to their last day as it was not for me to exact the retribution.  I know now it is not up to me.

I know we part ways on the next bomb and that is that I believe a woman has a right to choose how she handles her own body. If she chooses to terminate a pregnancy, prevent it from the onset, remove her reproductive organs, or change her sex completely; it is her choice and not yours or mine. What you do with your body is your business and yours alone and what I do with mine is mine alone. We do not get the right to decide how others should manage their own bodies.

Nor do we have the right to decide who lives or dies. This is ultimately not for us to make. No murder, death penalties, wars are something we should promote or participate.  That said, I do not decide your fate nor you do mine…

BUT….

I do decide my own, as that is my body – my choice. I will not serve to decide if someone gets the death penalty. I will not kill someone in self-defense or in times of war; but if my condition becomes so bad that I will be a burden you or anyone else I will find my way out.

The one other thing that I believe is that the guiltiest of guilty are the most vocal and exaggerating in their piety.

“The lady doth protest too much methinks.”  – Hamlet (Shakespeare)

Being an observer of people — when one overcompensates (too goody goody) or is totally vocally condemning and overly pious, there is a strong chance they are hiding something which is the opposite of their posture.

After all said, I am no saint and I know my fate if everything I have studied is correct. I would rather be a sinner than a hypocrite.

Less Than a Month To Go…

Posted on by misspoobles

In less than a month, I will hit the milestone year which aligns with my father’s collapse at work and his resulting brain cancer diagnosis.  He did not last a year from that diagnosis. His half-sister, Cindy and his brother, Tony also had the same kind of cancer originally found in my father which caused him to have a kidney removed. Cindy survived. Tony did not.

Last month, my voice had become hoarser with all the speaking I had been doing at work and my neck and sinuses have been inflamed. Each year, a new set of symptoms present themselves and I struggle and carry on; but I often wonder if I won the genetic lottery and I am going to get the same diagnosis as those before me.

He died at age 53. I turn 52 in less than a month and I am finding it hard to enjoy things while I feel less and less like myself. I am not steady on my feet after prolonged sitting. I don’t quite trust myself on trips alone for fear of collapsing one day myself.

I’ve noticed changes as I get closer to 52. There is an odor to me which is unlike the natural scent I have always known. It is strange and putrid. My skin is an off shade. (Don’t get me wrong, I knew it was changing since 1999 when I got paler and paler) Now the pink hue is missing and it is sallow. Really notice it in my lower limbs and my left arm.

And oh how I am tired! I’m not eager to run errands on weekends or nights after work anymore. I’m now having the groceries delivered most weeks and ordering supplies for the house online.

On a good day I take advantage of what I’m given and do as much as I can. The good days are not as frequent as they were a year ago. I am struggling.

You might have wondered why I’m going on about all of this. One reason is the genetic factor of what killed my father and his brother and how to identify the onset should I be the one.

Second and most importantly, each day is one better than the last; and even if I struggle and I am barely hanging in there it’s a gift. I cannot stress this enough: don’t waste a single moment. Enjoy it like a fine meal–savor every second you have.

Each Birthday after this point is a huge milestone and I’m going to appreciate the hell out of the day each year.